Homeschooling neurodivergent children requires flexibility, patience, and a willingness to adapt. No two days are the same, but having a structured routine with built-in choices, sensory supports, and hands-on learning helps our children thrive.
One of my children has Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA), so we incorporate choices and autonomy throughout the day. Another has Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder (ARFID), meaning meals require a non-pressured approach with safe food options.
Here’s a real-life look at our homeschool routine, including academic time, therapy sessions, sensory breaks, and outdoor play.
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Morning Routine: Visual Schedules & Choices
We start our day with a structured but flexible routine, using visual schedules to help with transitions. PDA makes direct demands difficult, so I offer choices whenever possible:

“Do you want to brush your teeth first or get dressed first?”

“Would you like pancakes or toast?”

“Do you want to check your schedule now or in five minutes?”
For my child with ARFID, breakfast is low-pressure and predictable:

Safe foods are always available (e.g., plain toast, yogurt, a specific brand of granola bars).

Gentle food exposure (placing a new food nearby without requiring them to eat it).

No forced eating, reducing anxiety around meals.
After breakfast, we ease into the day with:

Independent play (LEGO, drawing, quiet reading).

Swing time and sensory activities to regulate before structured learning.
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Social Skills Through Play: Board games with a PDA Twist
Next, we play Uno to build:

Turn-taking skills.

Impulse control (waiting for turns).

Emotional regulation around winning and losing.
Since PDA makes structured games feel like a demand, I offer low-pressure choices:

“Do you want to shuffle the cards or deal first?”

“Do you want to play Uno now or after your sensory break?”
This gives a sense of control and reduces resistance.
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Outdoor Learning: Movement & Real-World Skills
We head outside for fresh air, physical activity, and real-world learning:

A walk to the park for movement and regulation.

Collecting leaves and sticks for a nature-based sensory project.

Building a town in the sand, sparking creativity and problem-solving.

Discussing community safety and eloping risks in a natural setting.
For my PDA child, I provide low-pressure choices:

“Do you want to walk to the park or ride in your wagon?”
This reduces demand and increases cooperation.
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Handwriting Without Tears: Sensory-Friendly Writing Practice
Writing is one of our biggest challenges, so we use Handwriting Without Tears, incorporating:

Wooden letter shapes for hands-on learning.

Chalkboard with a water eraser for tactile feedback.

Sensory-friendly tools to improve fine motor skills.
For my PDA child, I offer a choice before starting:

“Would you like to use the chalkboard first or the wooden pieces?”
While one child works on handwriting, the other completes Acellus Power Homeschool for social studies and science.
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Math Time: Hands-On & Visual Learning
Math is another subject that benefits from a multisensory approach:

Math-U-See: Using blocks to visually understand addition and subtraction.

Beast Academy Online: Engaging, story-based math challenges.
To accommodate PDA, I let my child choose the order:

“Do you want to start with Math-U-See or Beast Academy?”
Each child has a visual schedule at their desk and can take sensory breaks anytime (trampoline, swinging seat, foot bands and balance board).
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Afternoon: Therapy Sessions (Speech & Occupational Therapy)
After lunch, we head to therapy for extra support:

Speech Therapy: Working on articulation, social communication, and expressive language.

Occupational Therapy (OT): Strengthening fine motor skills, sensory regulation, and handwriting.
Therapy days require extra transition support, so I use a countdown timer and give choices:

“Would you like to leave in five minutes or ten?”

“Do you want to bring your fidget toy or your weighted lap pad?”
This reduces anxiety and helps prepare for the transition.
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Lunch & ARFID Accommodations
For my child with ARFID, lunch is predictable and stress-free:

Safe foods (foods they’re comfortable eating daily).

No pressure to try new foods—we focus on creating a positive experience.

Gentle sensory exposure (e.g., letting them explore a new food with no expectation to eat it).
For my PDA child, I offer choices:

“Do you want your sandwich cut or whole?”

“Do you want to eat at the table or outside on the patio?”
After therapy and lunch, we head to the local jump park:

Burning off energy.

Gross motor skill development.

Social interactions in an unstructured environment.
To ease transitions, I give warnings before leaving:

“Would you like to jump for five more minutes or ten?”
This helps reduce meltdowns by giving them a sense of control.
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Why This Approach Works for Us
Homeschooling neurodivergent children means adapting, observing, and meeting them where they are. By incorporating:

Visual schedules to reduce anxiety.

Hands-on, sensory learning to increase engagement.

Frequent movement breaks to improve focus.

Choice and autonomy to accommodate PDA.

Low-pressure food exposure to support ARFID.

Therapy sessions for extra support.
We create an environment where learning feels safe and accessible.

Are you homeschooling neurodivergent kids? What strategies work for your family? Share your experiences in the comments below!
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